There have been seasons in my life that lasted way longer than I would have liked them too. After a long while I began to realize wishing those seasons away and turning to so many things but Jesus to make those seasons end was not working, but instead was making me bitter. My prayer in those seasons went from, "take this cup from me" to, "as long as it takes to get to a place of surrender I'm gonna stay right here." My hard times brought me to a place of fully surrendering fear and fully trusting Jesus, something I struggled severely with. Our sweet son was diagnosed with neurofibromatosis last week. I think if this had happened before those other hard seasons I would be totally crippled by fear right now. But I can honestly say that I'm not fearful of what this diagnosis might bring, sad yes, but not afraid. I used to always expect the worst. Expect whatever came next to be something that once again would bring bad news. This time, although it
Exodus 4:10 But Moses pleaded with the LORD, “O Lord, I’m not very good with words. I never have been, and I’m not now, even though you have spoken to me. I get tongue-tied, and my words get tangled.” Sometimes we don't feel good enough to do what God has called us to do. And sometimes we use that as an excuse to get out of it because we give into fear. At least that's how it's been for me. Initially when the Lord called me to start London Square Children’s Ministry my argument was, I'm not good at leading and organizing. I can jump in and help someone else who is leading and organizing but I can't start up a Ministry and lead it. I'm not good at that. And although that is true, it's not my strong suit, He equipped me to do it. And much fruit came from it. Then covid hit and I got pregnant. A long season away from the Ministry for the safety of myself and my baby. But I think that safety from a virus turned into safety of my time and energy. Honestly se