There have been seasons in my life that lasted way longer than I would have liked them too. After a long while I began to realize wishing those seasons away and turning to so many things but Jesus to make those seasons end was not working, but instead was making me bitter. My prayer in those seasons went from, "take this cup from me" to, "as long as it takes to get to a place of surrender I'm gonna stay right here."
My hard times brought me to a place of fully surrendering fear and fully trusting Jesus, something I struggled severely with. Our sweet son was diagnosed with neurofibromatosis last week. I think if this had happened before those other hard seasons I would be totally crippled by fear right now. But I can honestly say that I'm not fearful of what this diagnosis might bring, sad yes, but not afraid.
I used to always expect the worst. Expect whatever came next to be something that once again would bring bad news. This time, although it's not something I'd ever want for my baby, I know the Lord won't let us down. I've seen that time and time again in joyus seasons, and very dark seasons. So I rejoice in my sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character and character produces hope and hope does not put us to shame because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us (Romans 5:3-5).
Our prayer for Shaeffer is that no tumor ever touches his body. But even more than that we pray that he builds his life around Christ so that when the rain comes and winds blow He will make it through with hope and peace that only comes from Jesus. My boy is safe in the Father's hands.
Remember that fear that took our breath away?
Faith so weak that we could barely pray
But He heard every word, every whisper
Now those altars in the wilderness
Tell the story of His faithfulness
Never once did He fail, and He never will.
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